Every night I pray

To a god I'm not

Sure is there

Pleading to keep

What I've been given

To not have stripped from me

The greatest gift

I've been blessed with

This woman

This woman so beautiful

So kind so strong

This woman I can't

Help falling for

This woman so sweet and lovely

This lady that captivates

My restless heart

This amazing lover

Who is everything I'd dreamt of

God, let me keep her.

Write for the inspiration

Write for the boredom

Write for the potential

Write for the opportunity

Just write.

Her giant eyes

Hiding behind darkened lenses

And I think to myself

'The sun stole her soul'

So for today

I can't read her

I'm not sure what

She's thinking

Those windows are closed

And I start to sweat

Like I'm locked in a sauna

She grins with a

Smile of anonymity

I fidget with

A nervous uncertainty

She likes to see me squirm

And she knows she's got me

So I break and fall apart

Shear satisfaction

She picks me back up

Puts me together

And kisses my lips

Like she had no other intention

When does this stop?

When do we get serious?

When do we straighten up?

When do we let go of the excuses?

Do what we we're meant to do

Be who we we're meant to be

Rise above these chains

That keep us bound and captive

When do we break free?

Is this path of self-destruction eternal?

Or just cyclic?

What will it take?

My family disappointed

Health deteriorating

Friendships fading

When does that reality check come?

They say it's in the mail

I have yet to see it

Am I weak?

Or am I stubborn?

When do the lies cease?

When does honesty break through

Like sun through the clouds

Scorching these bloodshot eyes

With a cleansing chemical burn of hope

Scraping away these self-inflicted scars

You bastard

You touched me

As I slept

You asshole

You corrupted

My future

My family

My dreams

You polluted my life

Like a worm rots an apple

With your distasteful

Groping, dirty hands

In the night.